A Study in Angst
by Lemon Zinger
Summary: A very angsty to the point of humorous series of poems that show just how angsty I could get. For Elerrina Star, inspired by her and Mrspencil. Written in poetry form because I don't have the stamina to make it a full-length prose.
1. Chapter 1

**My poetic version of the prominent angst themes commonly found in Doyle fanfictions. This is way overdone, mostly inspired by a conversation with Elerrina Star and MrsPencil's poetry. **

This case starts off like any other

Or maybe it is quite abrupt

But either way this fine day

Trouble is about to erupt

The case is presented by a client

Whether by a visit or a letter

And sleuth and doctor leave the flat

Though Holmes forgets his sweater

The case is tricky, full of holes

But now the game is afoot

Holmes ignores the chilly air

And for his coughing blames the soot

Watson knows better than to say a word

Holmes won't listen to his pleas

He merely lends his coat and hopes

That the detective will not freeze

"The murder was done with an iron rod"

Our sleuth declares quite certain.

He does not see the ugly fellow

Watching from behind the curtain

Holmes leaves Watson to examine further

And the poor doctor is nabbed by the brute

Holmes realizes soon and without delay

He and Lestrade are in pursuit

Poor Holmes starts to panic

They lose sight of their quarry

(Because if Watson was rescued

It would be the end of the story)

**TBC**


	2. Chapter 2

Watson is taken to the criminal's lair

There he is beaten to the greatest extent

But he won't betray Holmes

No matter what torture they invent

Holmes meanwhile is clearly sick

But no other doctor will do

He also lacks an appetite

And coughs the night through

Nightmares plague both that night

Both are woken by their screams

Watson is beaten once again

Holmes imagines the criminal's schemes

(Now dear reader, you can imagine

Some of this has been done before

But you cannot even guess

What I have lying in store)

The next day Holmes has an epiphany

And he knows where to go

He grabs Lestrade for assistance

The poor inspector is tired though

They find the hideout and create a distraction

Holmes finds Watson half-dead

The criminals shoot at the detective

But Lestrade takes the bullets instead

Holmes and the PC's go to a hospital

Baring poor Lestrade and Watson

(By this point in the case

Holmes is wishing it had never begun)

**TBC**


	3. Chapter 3

Lestrade is pale and very weak

The doctors aren't sure if he'll make it

And Watson took quite a beating

He'll likely die the doctors admit

(But if they both die it'll ruin the angst,

And become a tragedy instead

Still, though, at any point,

I could proclaim one of them dead ;) )

So Watson will live, but when he wakes

He recognizes nothing at all

He is speechless and looks quite scared

Holmes waits until later to bawl

By this point Holmes has wore himself down

And collapses on the hospital bed

Luckily Mycroft arrives at that moment

And makes Holmes share the room instead

Watson feels bad for the fellow

Though he doesn't remember him at all

Still there was something in his eyes

He saw before the sudden fall

Watson gets help to relearn

And he and Holmes start again

Not that they have much else to do

Since together they must remain

(Hmm? What of poor Lestrade

Why I've quite forgotten his fate

Be patient dear readers soon enough

I will tell you of his state.)

**TBC**


	4. Chapter 4

Three criminals have not been caught

Though Yarders claim to have looked hard

And Holmes laments the incompetency

Of certain members of Scotland Yard

So of course they're out for revenge

(The criminals, not the Scotland Yard,

Though it would make a fine story

To have them catch Holmes off-guard)

So two criminals sneak into the room

It's late and the duo is asleep

And Holmes is awoken by the pain

Of a bullet going deep

Watson hears his comrade's cry

And instinct tells him to fight

But he is quite outnumbered

On that fateful night

Two more shots ring out

And the criminals crumble, dead

Watson looks up, slightly bewildered

But then there is a groan from the bed

Lestrade (for that is the hero) fetches help

And Holmes is quickly treated

And Watson is introduced to the inspector

While the work is completed

The criminals dead, all three are living.

It's a miracle they all pulled through

(Of course, the story is not over

But you don't want it to be, do you?)

**TBC**


	5. Chapter 5

One remaining criminal is out for more

His brother was killed you see

So he poisons some food and sends it up

The result he couldn't foresee

Watson trades the meal with Holmes,

And soon grows deathly ill

Holmes, in anger, goes to find the man

Lestrade follows, as loyal men will

The man is found lurking in the lobby,

He can't resist knowing if his plan will work

He gives himself away by a question

And Holmes goes quite berserk

Holmes wrestles the fellow to the ground,

But his injuries hinder his fight

Soon he is being choked

And seeing that great white light

Lestrade arrives just in time

To save the detective's life

And save the poor Doctor

From going through more strife

A constable is called and soon

The criminal is arrested

Though Holmes wanted to shoot him

And stubbornly protested

(A part of me wanted to say

That the hospital kicked them out

For causing so much trouble

But then that's not what this is about)

**TBC**


	6. Chapter 6

Watson recovered, and is back to normal

Holmes finally settled down to do the same

And for Lestrade, he was back at work

And enjoying some moments of fame

(Now if I was an evil author

I would hint at further peril

But then you would expect a sequel

So life returns to what Holmes calls 'sterile.')

Mrs. Hudson is glad to have them back

Though sometimes her patience is thin

And Mycroft can return to his routine

Though he watches them with a grin

Scotland Yard honors the three

With a simple, but well-attended celebration

And reporters hover around them

Until Mrs. Hudson resorts to intimidation

Then one day there's another knock

Another case comes to call

And this time the doctor is sure

Holmes is dressed properly for the fall

(I cannot seem to resist the urge,

Though don't get your hopes up, please)

This time it is Doctor Watson

Who begins to cough and sneeze.

**Maybe TBC? Who knows. I had an offer from Hades for a sequel written from a witness's POV. Anyone else with ideas to go along with this let me know. **


	7. Chapter 7

**Dunno why I randomly decided to add to this after it laying dusty on my shelf for so long. Hmm.. **

* * *

When we saw our favorite duo last

The doctor was suffering a cold.

It really is quite annoying Holmes,

That stubbornness the man upholds.

But at last Watson succumbs to pleas,

And is chased to his warm bed.

Meanwhile shadowy ghosts roam,

Dancing inside the detectives head.

Fears of failure and of a loss,

He hates to face in the silent night.

He can't sleep as he's kept awake,

Trying to chase away his fright.

Dark memories play in his mind,

Monsters will not let him sleep.

By the morning Watson's found him,

On the chair, an unceremonious heap.

This time the roles are reversed

As the doctor orders him to rest

But even he knows this can't be done

Until the detectives worries are repressed

Guessing the case caused this mood

He soothes the detective with praises

But he could not foresee his surprise

That comes with the queries Holmes' raises

"Why do you faithfully stand by me?

And why do I allow you to come along?

Narrowly skirting death for cases,

Is not at all where you truly belong."


	8. Chapter 8

Watson seemed hurt by this at first,

But then asked Holmes why not.

Holmes stammered, seeking explanation,

Watson continues with his thought.

"Holmes I value other lives above my own

And I enjoyed the puzzles you've solved,

So why would I leave your side now?

Letting our lengthy partnership dissolved?"

At this Holmes only shifts more nervously

And it's a while before at last he speaks

"I am tired of watching you get injured."

He admits with quickly reddening cheeks.

Watson, touched by this display of love

Is silently smiling at him for a time.

"But it's my greatest joy to serve with you

And watch you analyze mystery and crime.

I have no other occupation, save my patients,

But my brain sometimes needs stimulation too.

So if I'm not useless or cause distraction,

Why can I not risk my own life like you do?"

Holmes had to admire his selflessness,

And answerless, he just shook his head.

"It's my greatest joy to serve you," The other said.

"Like now when I get send you off to bed."

Holmes fought a little, but it was futile,

Watson's wasn't going to change his mind.

(But never was there ever such a man

A more loving friend you will not find.)


End file.
